News From Springfield

Featured Instigator Kevin Downing sends along the stunning news that a Simpsons character is coming out of the closet. I personally think they should have Mike Piazza in as a guest for the episode in question.

What's offensive about the article in question is that we get a freaking Seinfeld tagline ("Not that there's anything wrong with that") as a catchphrase. No one thought to pull out this immortal discussion:

Marge: "I'm very sorry you feel that way, because John invited us all out for a drive today, and we're going."

Homer: Wo-ho-ho, not me! And not because John's gay, but because he's a sneak. He should at least have the good taste to mince around and let everyone know that he's... that way."

Marge: "What on Earth are you talking about?"

Homer: "You know me, Marge. I like my beer cold, my TV loud and my homosexuals flaming."

I'm really hoping Vegas publishes odds on this. I'm reasonably certain that it won't be Milhouse. But it should be.