Terror Lake Celebrates Hannibal Crossing the Alps

Now even more people will be upset that I didn't ride into my wedding on the back of an elephant...

Reports of an elephant crossing the river or people trying to smuggle an elephant across were rampant Tuesday while an elaborate political stunt was taking shape near the mouth of the Rio Grande.

It was a while later that the stunt, which was a photo shoot, was abruptly met by federal agents.

“The elephant never made landfall into Mexico, but I tell you something, he could have made 15 laps back and forth, but no one showed up,” said Raj Peter Bhakta, a former star on the NBC show “The Apprentice,” who also is a Republican candidate for the 13th District U.S. House of Representatives seat in Eastern Pennsylvania.

Three elephants, two African and an Asian, were taken out to a ranch near Boca Chica beach to perform, the 31-year-old Bhakta said.

He was in Brownsville to raise funds with friends and decided to get a first-hand look at border security while he was here, he said.

In Brownsville, he witnessed half a dozen men swim under one of the international bridges “with complete immunity” which in turn prompted him to take the immigration issue to the next level.

Bhakta decided to see if he could get an elephant accompanied by a six-piece mariachi band across the river.

According to his Web site, he is in favor of “sensible immigration reform” and supports a border fence, local law enforcement assistance with immigration laws and the use of the National Guard troops to help the U.S. Border Patrol.

“To my surprise, the band played on, the elephants splashed away, and nobody showed up,” Bhakta said of the stunt. “I’m astounded.”

...“If I can get an elephant led by a mariachi band into this country, I think Osama bin Laden could get across with all the weapons of mass destruction he could get into this country,” Bhakta said.

The mariachi band was not immediately available for comment.

(hat tip: Instapundit) I love the last line of the story. Of course, no one mentioned if the elephants could be reached for comment. Stunts like this aside, can someone explain to me how anyone thinks a border fence would be a bad idea? Heck, at this point, I think we need to consider a moat. As for the three people on the planet who get the title of the post, I apologize for sending this link to everyone else.

In the meantime, I'd like to add that I'm not related to Bhakta, even though we share the same first name and likely share the same ethnic heritage. For one thing, I don't have the gumption to ask Anna Kournikova out. For another, he has better hair. Of course, I went to a better Catholic undergraduate institution than that crappy school in Boston -- after all, our basketball team is educated enough to guard an inbounds pass.