Nothing to See Here...

I'll be out Thursday, and probably Friday, hoping that the eye surgeon doesn't blind me. With luck, I might schedule a guest blogger, but I doubt it. In the meantime, enjoy the rest of the week.

The NFL Recap, Week Five

I do these at work as part of my duties as Sports Czar, so why not share with the greater public?

What a GREAT sports weekend.

We mean it. Great college football games all over the TV dial. Baseball playoffs everywhere, even if it meant watching the epitome of evil advance into the American League Championship Series (one tip – we’re not talking about the Red Sox). And best of all, the WNBA Finals.

Sorry. David Stern threatened to make us watch old tapes of Dennis Rodman’s MTV show if we didn’t plug the WNBA Finals. We’ll try to atone for that offense.

Speaking of offense… well, no one in DC would know what we’re talking about. All of us were subjected to Sunday night’s horror show at Fed Ex Field. Halloween arrived three weeks early in DC, as the Redskins fell to 1-4 following a 17-10 loss to Baltimore. The Skins managed to give up a 10-0 lead in the third quarter without Baltimore’s offense ever taking the field. Yes, you read that right. Maybe Joe Gibbs needs an offensive coordinator – we hear Steve Spurrier is available. You know, that Gibbs is an innovative coach – his team is losing games in ways we’d have never imagined.

Meanwhile, the New England Patriots continue to win more games in a row than anyone imagined. The Pats stuffed the Dolphins 24-10, setting an unofficial NFL record with their 19th consecutive win. The streak is unofficial because the NFL doesn’t count post-season games… although we suspect the streak is also unofficial because the NFL no longer counts wins over the Dolphins. At least the Dolphins have some company among the ranks of the winless. Buffalo also dropped another game, losing when the Jets Doug Brien kicked a late field goal to rally the Jets to a 16-14 win. We’re reasonably certain that the Bills have been punished enough – not only do they live in Buffalo, not only are they winless, not only are they within close proximity of Canada… well, we can’t think of much that’s worse than all that.

Unless you’re the Oakland Raiders, of course, who became the latest victims of the Peyton Manning Traveling Circus. The Colts annihilated the Raiders 35-14, and we’re pretty sure the score would have been worse if Manning hadn’t played the second half left-handed. Okay, maybe we’re exaggerating, but that’s what Dan Rather reported. Besides, we’re still wondering how the Colts could only score 35 points. Heck, the Steelers even scored 34 behind rookie QB Ben Roethlisberger. Of course, Pittsburgh was playing Cleveland, which is sort of like playing a high school team. Or the Redskins. Wait, that’s not fair – the Browns beat the Redskins.

Then again, at least the Redskins aren’t the Seahawks. The Seahawks are 3-1, but they were less than 10 minutes from an unbeaten record, cruising along with a 27-10 lead, sipping lattes on the sideline and trying to figure out whether Rams coach Mike Martz really is the father of the kid from Jerry Maguire. Less than a half-hour later, the Rams had rallied for a stunning 33-27 OT victory, as Rams QB Marc Bulger began imitating Kurt Warner circa 1999. Then again, the real Kurt Warner was busy in Dallas, leading the Giants to their fourth straight win, a 26-10 win over Dallas. Warner’s wife Brenda promptly called WFAN in New York to complain that Giants coach Tom Coughlin had banned her from team meetings. Coughlin fined Warner for getting married without Coughlin’s permission.

It was a bad weekend for football in Texas (we won’t even mention the Longhorns), despite the fact that Houston rallied from a 21-0 deficit to send their game to overtime. Alas, Vikings QB Dante Culpepper fired his fifth TD pass of the day to Marcus Robinson to beat the Texans 34-28. The Vikings offense is may be unstoppable, but their defense is weaker than the French military (on the list of Jeopardy topics we will never see, "Great French Military Victory of the 20th Century" is near the top). Speaking of weak defenses, the Packers somehow yielded 48 points to Tennessee on Monday night, dropping Green Bay to 1-4 following a 48-27 loss. You know, the Packers haven’t won a home game since John Kerry called their home stadium "Lambert Field"... and their defense has been incredibly weak since he said those words… all right, I’ll stop now.

The Falcons’ unbeaten season also stopped abruptly on Sunday, as Michael Vick and the Falcons fell to Detroit at home 17-10. The Lions have now won two straight road games, which is only remarkable when you consider that the Lions' last road win prior to this season took place before Ben Affleck had ever appeared on a tabloid. Meanwhile, the winless 49ers stormed back from 16 down in the fourth quarter to beat Arizona 31-28 in overtime. Of course, fewer people watched the game than watch MSNBC most nights.

Another winless team got off the schneid on Sunday, as the Buccaneers stunned the Saints in New Orleans. Saints fans promptly began wearing paper bags over their heads, although they may just be preparing for Mardi Gras – or may just be insecure about their looks. The Jaguars look pretty insecure themselves, after dropping a 34-21 decision to the Chargers. Chargers coach Marty Schottenheimer celebrated by hiring his unborn grandchild as the assistant trainer.

There was one other game to report, but it was just another loss by the defending NFC champion Panthers. We’ll wait till next week, when they’ve lost another game, before we report on them. Yes, in case you’re wondering, the Panthers visit Philadelphia next weekend.

The John Kerry Post of the Day

My latest discovery about my favorite cheese-eating surrendermonkey-looking Ketchup King cum Presidential candidate:

I'm too busy to say much today. But perhaps this post at Powerline sums it up. Take a look at the picture, take a deep breath, and wonder if you're ready for four years with this guy in charge.

Then again, maybe it says something about his defense policy that his bicycle is yellow.

The Yankees Are Evil, Part II

In our continuing feature...

If there's one thing worse than Derek Jeter in the postseason, it's Tim McCarver calling Derek Jeter's games in the postseason. Rob Neyer once wrote a terrific column detailing Jeter's inadequacies at shortstop, despite the non-stop hype by McCarver and his ilk. That was three years ago, and Jeter has actually gotten worse defensively. Yet McCarver will spend the next few weeks extolling the virtues of Derek Jeter to the point that most of us non-Yankee fans will need to vomit. If Jeter grounded into a double play, McCarver would spend the next ten minutes praising his freaking hustle down the line.

What's really aggravating about it is that McCarver doesn't have the good grace to declare his love openly for Jeter. Maybe then Jessica Alba would split with Jeter.

What Annoying Song is Stuck in My Head Today?

If I need to suffer with a song stuck in my head, why shouldn't you have to do the same? Sometimes they're good, most times they're bad... but no matter what, they make you suffer. So I like to share the suffering whenever it happens.

I once lost a bet to the Lord of Truth regarding this song. I thought for sure these were the words of one Pat Benatar. It turns out that what I always figured was a companion to "Hit Me With Your Best Shot" was actually some one-hit wonder's one hit.

That one hit wonder? Scandal...

You run run run away
It's your heart that you betray
Feeding on your hungry eyes
I bet your not so civilized

Well isn't love primitive
A wild gift that you want to give
Break out of captivity
And follow me, stereo jungle child
Love is the kill, your heart still wild

Shooting at the walls of heart ache, bang bang
I am the warrior
Well I am the warrior
And heart to heart you win
If you survive, the warrior, the warrior

You talk, talk, talk to me
Your eyes touch me physically
Stay with me, we'll take the night
As passion takes another bite, oh , oh, oh

Who's the hunter whos the game
I feel the beat call your name
I'll hold you close, to victory
I don't want to tame your animal style
You won't be caged in the call of the wild

Shooting at the walls of heart ache, bang bang
I am the warrior
Well I am the warrior
And heart to heart you win
If you survive, the warrior, the warrior
I am the warrior
Shooting at the walls of heart ache, the warrior
I am the warrior

You're welcome.

Does This Make it Fair to Call the French Reptiles?

The Lord of Truth sends us a story that seems to feature a small error, as noted by the language in bold...

Spain celebrated its National Day on Tuesday with a military parade that added French troops and snubbed the United States by dropping the recent participation of U.S. Marines.

It also honored veterans from both sides of Spain's 1936-1939 Civil War, despite criticism from left-wing politicians.

Forty-eight soldiers from a French regiment showing the French blue, red and white flag marched along Madrid's main boulevard in recognition of the 60th anniversary of the liberation of Paris from Nazi occupation.

The Italian flag was also represented by a Spanish-Italian amphibian group. All Spanish politicians rose from their seats when the flags passed.

As the Lord noted, "Unless Italy and Spain have secretly developed fighting frogs and newts, I think the word they mean to use in the 4th paragraph was 'amphibious'. Maybe there's an opening for a proofreader at the AP."

One more thing from the article...

In previous years, a contingent of U.S. Marines had been invited by the former government of Prime Minister Jose Maria Aznar, who forged a close relation with President Bush, as a mark of solidarity after the Sept. 11 terrorist attacks.

This year, the new Socialist government of Jose Luis Rodriguez Zapatero, which withdrew Spain's troops from Iraq immediately after taking power in April, ended what symbolized Aznar's close ties with Washington.

Defense Minister Jose Bono said last week he decided not to invite the Americans because "it is a national holiday, not a U.S holiday."

He added: "What does not continue is subordination and getting down on our knees for any foreign government, whichever it may be."

No, now they just get down on their knees and pull a Lewinsky for terrorists.

The John Kerry Post of the Day

My latest discovery about my favorite cheese-eating surrendermonkey-looking Ketchup King cum Presidential candidate:

Let's start with this beaut from Fallout Boy, as reported by Jim Geraghty at Kerry Spot...

Drudge is quoting Edwards as saying, "When John Kerry is president, people like Christopher Reeve are going to walk. Get up out of that wheelchair and walk again."

According to the Hotline, this was discussed on Fox News' Special Report.

FNC's Kondracke, on John Edwards promising that if Kerry wins, the disabled will walk again:

"What Edwards said is clearly part of the hype that the Kerry campaign has been delivering about how people are going to walk again next week, if we permit stem cell research to go forward. That's not true. It is probably decades away before it's really usable. On the other hand, you know, if we don't get started it will never happen" ("Special Report," 10/11).

NPR's Liasson: "I think this has become for a surprisingly, complicated scientific issue, this has proved to have real power on the campaign trail" ("Special Report," FNC, 10/11).

Columnist Charles Krauthammer: "I've heard a lot of hype over the last 30 years about the keys to the kingdom here in this issue. And all of them have proved false. For Edwards to make the claims he did is the worst demagoguery I've heard in Washington in a quarter century. To imply that Christopher Reeve was kept in the wheelchair because of the policies of the Bush administration on stem cells is ridiculous and insulting" ("Special Report," FNC, 10/11).

I'll bet some GOP 527 groups could get some mileage out of this statement in attack ads.

I wonder why Edwards didn't also promise that when John Kerry is president, people like Rodney Dangerfield are going to get some respect.

You know, there's being a salesman, and being a carnie con man. Guess what realm John Edwards just entered? Seriously, why doesn't Edwards start claiming Kerry will cure lepers as well?

Meanwhile, the Lord of Truth pointed out that John Kerry's no longer getting love in New Jersey...

Despite repeated pleas from the campaign of Sen. John Kerry, Gov. McGreevey has refused to release more than a token amount of state Democratic money for voter-turnout efforts on behalf of the party's presidential ticket in New Jersey.

With control over an estimated $2.5 million in state party funds, McGreevey has agreed to release only $25,000 to the Kerry campaign - infuriating New Jersey surrogates of Kerry and of his running mate, Sen. John Edwards.

The money shortage has severely undercut the Democrats' planned grassroots effort this fall and could impair their ability to get voters to the polls Nov. 2 in a must-win state for Kerry.

Already, just three weeks before the election, it has resulted in a notable absence throughout the state of lawn signs, bumper stickers, phone banks, and other traditional signs of an active campaign. And with little money to hire people, the Kerry campaign has had to rely almost exclusively on volunteers.

"We haven't been able to get signs out or other GOTV [get out the vote] activities set up the way we want to get it done," said John Graham, an Essex County Democrat heading the Kerry steering committee in New Jersey. "The governor should be doing more. He should open up those coffers. He's still responsible for trying to get a Democrat elected president, and that should be his total goal right now."

Graham added: "The money's there. I guess they're saving it for another year."

Indeed, that was the reason given by the Democrat running the state committee on behalf of McGreevey.

That Hillary in 2008 Campaign is looking more likely by the minute.

The Yankees Are Evil, Part I

Once again, America will suffer through the horror.

I'm talking, of course, about the Yankees in the baseball playoffs.

New Yorkers probably will be surprised to learn this, but most of America finds Derek Jeter annoying. We think the pinstripes are assinine. And we hate the Evil Empire known as the Yankees.

This has nothing to do with countless years about hearing about the greatness of Babe Ruth, or having to deal with the fact that Jeter is dating Jessica Alba. No, it has more to do with the constant reminders that the Yankees are baseball's marquee franchise, and the fact that Yankee fandom is like a spreading disease. My poor baby sister is now a Yankee fan... then again, my Dad, who had the misfortune of living in New York upon his arrival stateside, also finds time to root for the Ambassadors of Satan. See what I mean? This disease is attacking members of my family, for crying out loud!

So, count me in with the cursed Red Sox this time. Not that I enjoy rooting for Boston's legacy of losing to end, but you take what you can get. After each game, I plan to present one moment that proves the evil nature of the Yankee menace.

And trust me, it will be easy.

Tonight's Proof the Yankees are Evil: George Steinbrenner. Two words, nothing more needed.

G'Day, Mate!

As noted yesterday, there are all sorts of good reasons to send out congratulations to our Australian friends. The Lord of Truth gives us one more...

A 60-year-old woman jumped on the back of a crocodile as it dragged a man from his tent in northern Australia on Monday, but was then attacked by the crocodile, which dragged her toward the ocean until it was shot dead.

The 60-year-old woman and 34-year-old man suffered broken limbs, cuts and bruises in the attack by the 12.6 foot crocodile, said wildlife and rescue officials.

The attack occurred around 4 a.m. as the man slept in a tent with his wife and child on the shores of Bathurst Bay, 186 miles north of Cairns in Queensland state.

"The crocodile walked into the tent and dragged the man out," said Stephen Pemberthy from the Royal Flying Doctor Service, which airlifted the injured campers to hospital.

"A 60-year-old woman in an adjacent tent heard the commotion and jumped on the crocodile," Pemberthy told Reuters.

The crocodile let go of the man and bit the woman, pulling her toward the water before another person shot it dead.

The injured campers managed to set off a rescue beacon, capturing the attention of government wildlife officials in the area who were eradicating wild pigs.

As the Lord noted, that last line may be the best part. I mean, name another country where government officials are out eradicating wild pigs. In fact, maybe they should just skip the last debate tomorrow night and just have President Bush and Ketchup Boy eradicate some pigs.

Signs, Signs, Everywhere...

No, I'm not trying to get that stupid song in your head. But the Lord of Truth fills us in on the latest from Eugene, Oregon...

The signs marking High Street have become a hot commodity and coveted dorm room decoration in these parts.

But what might seem like a sophomore prank is turning into a costly problem for the city, home to the University of Oregon. In the last decade, officials say they've had to replace the sign nearly 350 times.

Besides High Street, the University Street and Westward Ho Avenue signs are also frequently stolen.

The missing street markers are part of a backlog of about 100 signs that city crews will replace in coming months, said Damon Joyner, traffic technical team supervisor for the city.

"Sometimes they're hit by vehicles. Sometimes, they just seem to disappear," he said. "We've had instances of people just taking a chain saw to the post."

One might suggest CHANGING the name to something like "Hi" Street. And naming something "Westward Ho" Avenue in a college town ranks up there as a dumb decision at the same level as starting a land war in Asia.

The John Kerry Post of the Day

My latest discovery about my favorite cheese-eating surrendermonkey-looking Ketchup King cum Presidential candidate:

Regular reader NC points out one of the best interplays on Kerry we've seen, from the New York Times Magazine piece over the weekend...

On an evening in August, just after a campaign swing through the Southwest, Kerry and I met, for the second of three conversations about terrorism and national security, in a hotel room overlooking the Ferris wheel on the Santa Monica pier. A row of Evian water bottles had been thoughtfully placed on a nearby table. Kerry frowned.

''Can we get any of my water?'' he asked Stephanie Cutter, his communications director, who dutifully scurried from the room. I asked Kerry, out of sheer curiosity, what he didn't like about Evian.

''I hate that stuff,'' Kerry explained to me. ''They pack it full of minerals.''

''What kind of water do you drink?'' I asked, trying to make conversation.

''Plain old American water,'' he said.

''You mean tap water?''

''No,'' Kerry replied deliberately. He seemed now to sense some kind of trap. I was left to imagine what was going through his head. If I admit that I drink bottled water, then he might say I'm out of touch with ordinary voters. But doesn't demanding my own brand of water seem even more aristocratic? Then again, Evian is French -- important to stay away from anything even remotely French.

''There are all kinds of waters,'' he said finally. Pause. ''Saratoga Spring.'' This seemed to have exhausted his list. ''Sometimes I drink tap water,'' he added.

Man, Karl Rove really did get inside his head. Yeesh.

But this is the paragraph everyone will remember...

When I asked Kerry what it would take for Americans to feel safe again, he displayed a much less apocalyptic worldview. ''We have to get back to the place we were, where terrorists are not the focus of our lives, but they're a nuisance,'' Kerry said. ''As a former law-enforcement person, I know we're never going to end prostitution. We're never going to end illegal gambling. But we're going to reduce it, organized crime, to a level where it isn't on the rise. It isn't threatening people's lives every day, and fundamentally, it's something that you continue to fight, but it's not threatening the fabric of your life.''

What's strange about this view is that it's very revealing... while horribly naive. Kerry wants us to return to a world where we just figure terrorism is something that happenms elsewhere, and we live our lives without getting stressed about it. I admire the idea that we can someday get to a world without terrorism, but I don't think we can settle for a world where we view terrorism as solely a law enforcement problem like gambling or prostitution. Face it, the latter two activities are ones that effect the person committing the acts, and are banned because of our society finds the immoral. Terrorism kills others and estroys their property. There's no level of terror that's acceptable.

Maybe I'm just channeling this brilliant response from Rudy Guiliani...

In fact, his comments are kind of extraordinary, particularly since he thinks we used to before September 11 live in a relatively safe world. He says we have to get back to the place we were, where terrorists are not the focus of our lives, but they’re a nuisance.

I’m wondering exactly when Senator Kerry thought they were just a nuisance. Maybe when they attacked the USS Cole? Or when they attacked the World Trade Center in 1993? Or when they slaughtered the Israeli athletes at the Munich Olympics in 1972? Or killed Leon Klinghoffer by throwing him overboard? Or the innumerable number of terrorist acts that they committed in the 70s, the 80s and the 90s, leading up to September 11?

This is so different from the President’s view and my own, which is in those days, when we were fooling ourselves about the danger of terrorism, we were actually in the greatest danger. When you don’t confront correctly and view realistically the danger that you face, that’s when you’re at the greatest risk. When you at least realize the danger and you begin to confront it, then you begin to become safer. And for him to say that in the good old days – I’m assuming he means the 90s and the 80s and the 70s -- they were just a nuisance, this really begins to explain a lot of his inconsistent positions on how to deal with it because he’s not defining it correctly.

As a former law enforcement person, he says ‘I know we’re never going to end prostitution. We’re never going to end illegal gambling. But we’re going to reduce it.’ This is not illegal gambling; this isn’t prostitution. Having been a former law enforcement person for a lot longer than John Kerry ever was, I don’t understand his confusion. Even when he says ‘organized crime to a level where it isn’t not on the rise,’ it was not the goal of the Justice Department to just reduce organized crime. It was the goal of the Justice Department to eliminate organized crime. Was there some acceptable level of organized crime: two families, instead of five, or they can control one union but not the other?

The idea that you can have an acceptable level of terrorism is frightening. How do you explain that to the people who are beheaded or the innocent people that are killed, that we’re going to tolerate a certain acceptable [level] of terrorism, and that acceptable level will exist and then we’ll stop thinking about it? This is an extraordinary statement. I think it is not a statement that in any way is ancillary. I think this is the core of John Kerry’s thinking.

Rudy's right, and in the end, it's why I keep thinking Kerry seems more like Jimmy Carter every day. And no, that's not a compliment.

Only in California, Part 7,341,232

It goes without saying that this story could only take place in California...

A group of California women aged from 51 to 84 posed for a racy calendar to raise money for their local firehouse, but the town turned down the cash as too hot to handle.

The women raised $30,000 to help fix up Carmel-by-the-Sea's firehouse because the upscale town was short of funds, calendar organizer Patty Ross said on Friday.

"I learned we were $2.2 million in debt and thought it would be a fun idea," said Ross.

She said she had obtained permission from the mayor to use the firehouse and its equipment as props for the "Carmel Fire Belles" calendar, which features some partially nude shots.

"One of them is a school teacher, one is a business owner," said Ross, who is Miss November. "We're just hard-working members of the community who thought we were doing a nice thing."

Carmel's mayor was not immediately available for comment, but City Attorney Don Freeman said town officials decided that taking the group's money would open the town to potential lawsuits.

"It would open us up to workplace causes of action such as sexual harassment and hostile environment and things of that nature," Freeman said. "This is the kind of thing that just can't be done in the workplace ... It runs the risk of offending people."

84 years old? You know, I am pretty offended.

Witless in Seattle

The Lord of Truth points out this utterly odd story with a happy ending...

A teenager was found alive in her wrecked car after being missing for eight days.

Laura Hatch, 17, last seen at a party Oct. 2, was found Sunday in her 1996 Toyota Camry about 150 feet below a road in this suburb east of Seattle, King County sheriff's deputies said.

Hatch was listed in serious condition at Harborview Medical Center in Seattle, where she was being treated dehydration, a possible blood clot, broken ribs, a broken leg and facial injuries, said her sister, Amy Hatch.

"We were afraid that we weren't going to find her, we weren't going to get her back," the sister told KING television in Seattle. "This is the best thing that could happen because there were a million awful scenarios."

Hatch evidently went eight days without food or water, sheriff's Sgt. John Urquhart said, adding that there had been no indication of foul play.

"There was no police search," he added. "We felt she was most likely a runaway."

Sha Nohr, whose daughter is a friend of Hatch, found the teen Sunday in a wooded area, where 200 volunteers had searched unsuccessfully the day before.

Boy, the cops were really helpful, weren't they? Then again, perhaps the 200 volunteers need a seeing-eye dog. Remind me never to get lost in Washington state.

Good News... Not that Anyone's Talking About It

Let's start in Australia, where Prime Minister John Howard won re-election despite the blatant efforts of John Kerry and several others...

Most opinion polls had forecast a tight race between Howard's Liberal-National coalition and a resurgent Labor Party under its brash new leader, Mark Latham, 43.

But computer predictions of Saturday's election result showed the government won a fourth consecutive term in office with an even bigger majority in the 150-member House of Representatives -- from 82 seats to as many as 87.

Labor was predicted to lose four seats to 60, with the three remaining held by independents.

The government also looked set to gain ground in the 76-member Senate, where Labor and its allies held a majority and have blocked key Howard legislative initiatives, like the full privatisation of telecommunications giant Telstra.

Media analysts suggested the coalition might fall just one seat short of the 39 seats needed to control the Senate, making legislative deals with independents easier.

Howard, 65 and facing forced retirement in the event of defeat Saturday, was ebullient in victory.

"This nation stands on the threshold of a new era of great achievement," he told a cheering crowd in a Sydney hotel.

"This is a truly historic achievement for our two parties," he said, noting his coalition was the first in some 40 years to have expanded its parliamentary majority in two successive elections.

Latham, who only took over the Labor Party 10 months ago and won widespread praise for setting the policy agenda during most of the six-week election campaign, vowed to fight on and make another bid for power in 2007.

"I have had a lot of people say that we have made the opposition strong and when there is a strong opposition, Australian democracy is so much stronger," he said.

"We'll continue to do that in the coming parliamentary term, we'll make sure the government is held to account," he said.

Latham, a fiery activist from a working class background in Sydney, had vowed to pull Australian troops from Iraq if he won.

His defeat by Howard will be good news for US President George W Bush, who also faces a tough fight for re-election next month against Senator John Kerry, like Latham a strident critic of the US Iraq policy.

The opening paragraph of the AFP dispatch, which I skipped, tried desperately to attribute the victory to Austalia's strong economy, rather than serving as support for Howard's policy of allying his nation with the U.S. in Iraq. John O'Sullivan provided a nice piece in the New York Post...

Prime Minister John Howard, a strong ally of America in general, was committed to supporting the United States in the Afghan and Iraq wars. Labor's leader, Mark Latham, had committed his party to bring home most Aussie troops in Iraq by Christmas.

If Labor had won, the world would have seen the result as a dramatic erosion of international support for George Bush's Iraq intervention — much more important than the Spanish elections (which threw out a Bush ally in favor of a left-wing government that immediately withdrew Spanish troops).

Australia has been a faithful U.S. ally in every American war since 1917 without needing (in John Kerry's words) to be either "coerced or bribed." At risk was a splintering of the English-speaking alliance (America, Australia and Great Britain) that has been the moral and military core of the war on terrorism.

A Howard defeat would have been a setback for the Anglosphere, a disaster for the United States and a catastrophe for George W. Bush (and Tony Blair). And it would have been celebrated as such — make no mistake — by France, Germany, Middle Eastern despots, the United Nations, and the massed NGOs (non-governmental organizations) of the "international community."

But Howard won. Indeed, he won a landslide of sweeping proportions — something rare by the standards of the cautious Aussie electorate. After three terms in office — when the usual sentiment of voters is "Time for A Change" — Howard actually increased his majority to an unassailable 30 seats. He gained control of the Senate — the first time since 1981 that the Coalition has controlled both Houses.

...Al Qaeda has received a serious setback, Kofi Annan a rebuke, France and Germany a disappointment — and the media elites a slap in the face so stinging that outside Australia Howard's victory has been a non-story.

Not for the first time, America owes the Australian people a hearty vote of thanks. Something on the lines of "Good on ya, Cobber. Have an ice-cold tube of Fosters on us."

Better yet, Afghanistan followed suit with their election on Saturday... with no violence to mar the historic day...

Many hoped Afghanistan's historic presidential election Saturday would bring an end to decades of war; others prayed it would lead to a strong new government that could improve education and create jobs in this poverty-stricken land.

As people lined up to vote across this long-suffering country, where 100,000 security forces including U.S. troops were deployed to thwart attacks from Taliban insurgents, ordinary Afghans expressed optimism that they were casting ballots for a new era -- despite a controversy over allegations of electoral fraud.

"I am old, but this vote is not just for me. It is for my grandchildren," said Nuzko, 58, a widow who stood in line at a Kabul voting station. Like many Afghans, she uses only one name. "I want Afghanistan to be secure and peaceful."

Gul Sum, a 60-year-old housewife, said the election was a chance for the country's often-
warring ethnic groups to unite and to give women -- many of them clad in all-enveloping burqas or in black veils as they waited to vote -- an unprecedented exercise in power.

"For the first time, women are having a say in the future of Afghanistan," Gul Sum said. "We are fed up with war."

The contest pitted interim President Hamid Karzai, installed after the U.S.-led invasion after the Sept. 11, 2001, attacks, against 15 other candidates in a direct election unprecedented in a country that has known monarchy, Soviet occupation, warlord-fueled civil war and the Taliban theocracy in the past quarter-century. A run-off will be held if there is no majority winner.

"Everyone knows Hamid Karzai will win, so what is the point of voting?" said Mohammed Nahim, a restaurant owner, who couldn't be bothered to cast a ballot. "No one will beat him."

Well, at least he's learning how to act like many Americans at the polls. Jokes aside, this is beyond historic, and deserves more coverage than it will get. We've accomplished something truly wonderful in Afghanistan, and it would be nice if people took time to realize the sacrifices and efforts of our soldiers and leaders and what they've done.

AllahPundit has some great pics up. Aussie blogger Tim Blair has been celebrating for three days straight. Maybe President Bush summed it up best when talking about the Afghan elections...

The first person to vote in the presidential election, three years after the Taliban ruled that country with such barbarism, was a 19-year-old woman, an Afghan refugee, who fled her homeland during the civil war.

Here's what she said: "I cannot explain my feelings, just how happy I am. I would never have thought I would be able to vote in this election."She's voting in this election because the United States of America believes that freedom is the Almighty God's gift to each man and woman in this world. (Applause.) And today is an appropriate day for Americans to remember and thank the men and women of our Armed Forces who liberated Afghanistan. (Applause.)

Damn right.

Good News... Not that Anyone's Talking About It

Let's start in Australia, where Prime Minister John Howard won re-election despite the blatant efforts of John Kerry and several others...

Most opinion polls had forecast a tight race between Howard's Liberal-National coalition and a resurgent Labor Party under its brash new leader, Mark Latham, 43.

But computer predictions of Saturday's election result showed the government won a fourth consecutive term in office with an even bigger majority in the 150-member House of Representatives -- from 82 seats to as many as 87.

Labor was predicted to lose four seats to 60, with the three remaining held by independents.

The government also looked set to gain ground in the 76-member Senate, where Labor and its allies held a majority and have blocked key Howard legislative initiatives, like the full privatisation of telecommunications giant Telstra.

Media analysts suggested the coalition might fall just one seat short of the 39 seats needed to control the Senate, making legislative deals with independents easier.

Howard, 65 and facing forced retirement in the event of defeat Saturday, was ebullient in victory.

"This nation stands on the threshold of a new era of great achievement," he told a cheering crowd in a Sydney hotel.

"This is a truly historic achievement for our two parties," he said, noting his coalition was the first in some 40 years to have expanded its parliamentary majority in two successive elections.

Latham, who only took over the Labor Party 10 months ago and won widespread praise for setting the policy agenda during most of the six-week election campaign, vowed to fight on and make another bid for power in 2007.

"I have had a lot of people say that we have made the opposition strong and when there is a strong opposition, Australian democracy is so much stronger," he said.

"We'll continue to do that in the coming parliamentary term, we'll make sure the government is held to account," he said.

Latham, a fiery activist from a working class background in Sydney, had vowed to pull Australian troops from Iraq if he won.

His defeat by Howard will be good news for US President George W Bush, who also faces a tough fight for re-election next month against Senator John Kerry, like Latham a strident critic of the US Iraq policy.

The opening paragraph of the AFP dispatch, which I skipped, tried desperately to attribute the victory to Austalia's strong economy, rather than serving as support for Howard's policy of allying his nation with the U.S. in Iraq. John O'Sullivan provided a nice piece in the New York Post...

Prime Minister John Howard, a strong ally of America in general, was committed to supporting the United States in the Afghan and Iraq wars. Labor's leader, Mark Latham, had committed his party to bring home most Aussie troops in Iraq by Christmas.

If Labor had won, the world would have seen the result as a dramatic erosion of international support for George Bush's Iraq intervention — much more important than the Spanish elections (which threw out a Bush ally in favor of a left-wing government that immediately withdrew Spanish troops).

Australia has been a faithful U.S. ally in every American war since 1917 without needing (in John Kerry's words) to be either "coerced or bribed." At risk was a splintering of the English-speaking alliance (America, Australia and Great Britain) that has been the moral and military core of the war on terrorism.

A Howard defeat would have been a setback for the Anglosphere, a disaster for the United States and a catastrophe for George W. Bush (and Tony Blair). And it would have been celebrated as such — make no mistake — by France, Germany, Middle Eastern despots, the United Nations, and the massed NGOs (non-governmental organizations) of the "international community."

But Howard won. Indeed, he won a landslide of sweeping proportions — something rare by the standards of the cautious Aussie electorate. After three terms in office — when the usual sentiment of voters is "Time for A Change" — Howard actually increased his majority to an unassailable 30 seats. He gained control of the Senate — the first time since 1981 that the Coalition has controlled both Houses.

...Al Qaeda has received a serious setback, Kofi Annan a rebuke, France and Germany a disappointment — and the media elites a slap in the face so stinging that outside Australia Howard's victory has been a non-story.

Not for the first time, America owes the Australian people a hearty vote of thanks. Something on the lines of "Good on ya, Cobber. Have an ice-cold tube of Fosters on us."

Better yet, Afghanistan followed suit with their election on Saturday... with no violence to mar the historic day...

Many hoped Afghanistan's historic presidential election Saturday would bring an end to decades of war; others prayed it would lead to a strong new government that could improve education and create jobs in this poverty-stricken land.

As people lined up to vote across this long-suffering country, where 100,000 security forces including U.S. troops were deployed to thwart attacks from Taliban insurgents, ordinary Afghans expressed optimism that they were casting ballots for a new era -- despite a controversy over allegations of electoral fraud.

"I am old, but this vote is not just for me. It is for my grandchildren," said Nuzko, 58, a widow who stood in line at a Kabul voting station. Like many Afghans, she uses only one name. "I want Afghanistan to be secure and peaceful."

Gul Sum, a 60-year-old housewife, said the election was a chance for the country's often-
warring ethnic groups to unite and to give women -- many of them clad in all-enveloping burqas or in black veils as they waited to vote -- an unprecedented exercise in power.

"For the first time, women are having a say in the future of Afghanistan," Gul Sum said. "We are fed up with war."

The contest pitted interim President Hamid Karzai, installed after the U.S.-led invasion after the Sept. 11, 2001, attacks, against 15 other candidates in a direct election unprecedented in a country that has known monarchy, Soviet occupation, warlord-fueled civil war and the Taliban theocracy in the past quarter-century. A run-off will be held if there is no majority winner.

"Everyone knows Hamid Karzai will win, so what is the point of voting?" said Mohammed Nahim, a restaurant owner, who couldn't be bothered to cast a ballot. "No one will beat him."

Well, at least he's learning how to act like many Americans at the polls. Jokes aside, this is beyond historic, and deserves more coverage than it will get. We've accomplished something truly wonderful in Afghanistan, and it would be nice if people took time to realize the sacrifices and efforts of our soldiers and leaders and what they've done.

AllahPundit has some great pics up. Aussie blogger Tim Blair has been celebrating for three days straight. Maybe President Bush summed it up best when talking about the Afghan elections...

The first person to vote in the presidential election, three years after the Taliban ruled that country with such barbarism, was a 19-year-old woman, an Afghan refugee, who fled her homeland during the civil war.

Here's what she said: "I cannot explain my feelings, just how happy I am. I would never have thought I would be able to vote in this election."She's voting in this election because the United States of America believes that freedom is the Almighty God's gift to each man and woman in thisworld. (Applause.) And today is an appropriate day for Americans to remember and thank the men and women of our Armed Forces who liberated Afghanistan. (Applause.)

Damn right.